Welcome to my personal site. Here, you will find my idle musings, impassioned essays, perhaps a photo essay or two, along with considered reviews of books and popular culture and other snippets of bemusement from my regular and creative life.
What does it mean, in 2023, to host a personal site?
I have no idea! But no doubt I will find out as the site develops.
Right now the site functions very well as a repository of information for family and friends about a forthcoming birthday celebration. And this singular blog post.
I liked the idea of starting a new blog on the 1st day of June, so I began with just a few lines. Nothing earthshattering, but here we are.
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Recently I listened to two episodes of a podcast presented by three young men.1 Exactly how young I cannot say for sure – perhaps somewhere in their 4th decade, though I could be terribly wrong about that. While listening, I found myself surprised to be both rivetted and moved. The podcasters, who are Hugh Van Cuylenberg, Ryan Shelton and Josh Van Cuylenberg, interviewed Ben Shewry, renowned chef and owner of Attica, one of Australia’s top 10 restaurants and formerly No. 20 in the world (No. 53 in 2022).2
Why the surprise? First, I was taken aback by my own bias, having expected them to discuss “typically Aussie blokey” stuff; no need to give examples here, just tap into your regular stereotypes and tropes.
Second, they talked with great passion and enthusiasm about some pretty serious yet remarkably interesting topics, from how to be a better dad, spouse, human, to their experiences of anxiety and depression; the emotional baggage that often accompanies separation and divorce, such as the loss of friendships; having a meltdown when a usually failsafe recipe for crumpets goes horribly wrong. Body dysmorphic disorder. Seeking help from a psychologist or other mental health professional. Writing a gratitude letter to a beloved parent – and then reading it to them.
In other words, they chewed the fat on the important stuff society usually expects [only] women talk about and confide in their friends. No prizes, then for guessing the third reason for my surprise: that these men were wholly and completely relatable. There goes another assumption. I mean, why should they not be entertaining, erudite and relatable to a woman in her 50s? Wise, sensitive, charming?
Because as a society we have tended to box boys and men into corners from which the only escape has been fight or flight. But the times, they have most certainly changed.
Recognising and confronting the bias in my initial reaction to the podcast turned out to be a positive and empowering act for me. By the end of the two episodes I felt tremendous admiration and pride for these four creative humans. And gratitude that they had the courage to share their authentic, vulnerable selves with the world in such a generous and positive way.
References
- The Imperfects, https://theresilienceproject.com.au/at-home/podcasts/
- https://www.top10restaurants.com.au/attica.html